Nearly ten years ago, I accepted a new job and moved from Salt Lake City, Utah to Boise, Idaho. My employer previous to that provided me with tools that my new employer did not. Among those tools was a cell phone.

My first order of business when I arrived in Boise was to get a local cell phone. I shopped around a bit and decided that, for the money, T-Mobile was the way to go.

If figured I'd find what I needed at the mall since there are usually a plethora of kiosks and stores to choose from.

I found my target salesman and went in for the buy.

Now, if you know how I buy, you'll understand that I make most of my decisions by research before I buy. It allows me to get the best deal possible.

As I started the process, I decided if it cost about $100 to get the right phone, I'd be okay with it. So, I started looking at the phones to make the final decision, the sales associate started telling me all the virtues of the free phone. Then he pointed out the features and benefits of the phone that was $100 but with a $50 rebate.

Since I had already decided that I was willing to spend $100 to get a phone, the net cost of $50 was a no brainer for me.

For some reason, I paused to think. That's not common for me when I've already made up my mind, but in this case I paused long enough for the salesman to say, "You know what, how about I give you that phone for $50 then you can keep the $50 rebate and it will be like getting the phone for free.

At that point, I realized that I could probably get more if I played my cards right. I decided to make an obvious pause with a hint of contemplation in my face. Sure enough, after about 20 seconds of me being silent combined with an eager salesman, he spoke up and said, "Let me just give you this phone for free and you can keep the $50 rebate."

I signed right up.

In thinking about that experience after the fact, I realized that what he thought I was stewing over was whether or not to buy the service. He didn't understand that I had decided T-Mobile was right for me before I even met him.

The reason he didn't understand what I was thinking was because he didn't ask. He never asked what direction I was leaning or what was holding up my decision. He simply made an assumption as to my thinking then started resolving concerns that didn't exist.

When you are trying to persuade someone to do something the way you want, you have to make sure you understand the objections first. If you don't, you'll end up leaving something on the table.